The Seven Stages of Stroking a Feral Cat

From my observations there are seven stages to petting and stroking a feral cat or kitten that you must pass through in order to take them from wild to domesticated. It's important to go through this process in order so you can build trust between you. 

Progress – measured over time – will depend on the cat's age, confidence, personality, dominance and status, and whether they were raised as a single kitten or in a litter by their mother and whether you're socialising one or more cats. As you go through these stages and you find the cat or kitten reacting positively then praise them in a high pitch voice with a "good girl/boy" or by using their name. 

The seven phases to stroking a feral cat and building rapport are:

1. "Soft" Nape to Tail Tip Touch – this needs to be a light finger or palm brush from the nape of the neck, down the spine and to the tip of the cat's tail. The pressure is soft – you should only be able to feel their coat at this stage. Be aware of how you approach the cat. Keep yourself low on the floor and come in from the side or back rather than front on and over the top, as the cat will perceive your hand as a threatening implement and may even swat it. The first time you attempt to stroke a feral cat is best done when they're off guard. They need to be comfortable enough with you to be within two feet of your vicinity and relaxed enough so their attention is focused away from you – the best times are when they're eating or playing and concentrating on food or a toy. The first few times you touch them, expect them to either move or run away, or, to shrink from your touch so that their bodies lower onto the ground and they crawl or wriggle away. They may also hiss, but don't be dissuaded – this is quite a normal reaction and will lose its intensity as time goes by until it completely disappears. You'll need to be patient and persistent in your efforts until they feel comfortable and you feel ready to process to (2). Please note that the slinking to the floor behaviour may continue through the other stages but will eventually stop when they trust you. Also note that you may find yourself taking two steps forward on one morning and then one step back the following morning. Don't be concerned – they will gradually learn to relax. 

2. "Firm" Nape to Tail Tip Stroke – Once the cats/kittens are comfortable with the soft touch you can increase the pressure on their hair and skin to the point of actually feeling the bumpy spinal disks and their tail bones. This is more of a massaging move. Cats in general like this stroking as it quite pleasurable for them. Domesticated cats usually respond with a purr; if your feral cat begins purring at this stage then you've made excellent progress. Positive body language to look out for in response to this move is the cat walking high with a tall head and tail or twisting around to meet your hand again so you can continue patting it, or rubbing its head and flank against your hand or body.

 

3. Top of the Head Tickle – Top of the head action is perceived in general to be a threatening move, and feral cats/kittens may take a little while to grow out of this response. However, it's all in the approach. Again, don't stand or hover over the cat. Get down on the floor with them. Avoid bringing your hand in from up high; rather, bring it in from the side in a natural or organic way incorporating stage (2). Just tickle the cat briefly on the forehead for no longer than three seconds with a firm stroke. 

4. Under Chin Tickle – This is one of the most effective cat touches and will invariably raise a purr. All cats love having their chin tickled and stroked. Keep your fingers loose and scratch gently and firmly in the throat area until their head raises to meet the action. Their eyes will invariably soften and close as well.

5. Play Roll-over – Part of the socialisation process is to play with your cat and get him/her to engage in mock hunting behaviour. You can do this by dragging twine attached to a trinket across the floor or over furniture, or using my latest favourite toy – getting a strip of firm material such as flannellette and tying a knot at the other end. A relaxed and happy cat will start to tussle with the toy and do roll overs while you are tugging on one end and he/she is tugging on the other. They will expose their belly while grappling with their mock prey. You can give their belly a rub but expect to be play-bitten or play-scratched as the kitten rolls over. This is not an out-and-out aggressive response but one in which their claws maybe sheathed or unsheathed in practice hunt behaviour. The older the cat the harder the claws. It's important to note that if the cat is truly attacking you then your hands will be torn quite badly. The play responses are usually light scratches that I put down to over-enthusiasm and are a small price to pay. The scratches will heal pretty quickly. If the cat gets too rowdy then tap him/her on the nose and caution them. I have only come across this once in a lifetime of owning cats and it came from a neighbour's domesticated Siamese who had a tolerance of about two minutes for petting and then signalled her displeasure after that with a bout of side-to-side tail lashing. If her human companions didn't heed her body language then they would get a bite or scratch that would draw blood.

6. Lap Cuddle – Once the feral cat/kitten is comfortable and has bonded with you they will often climb on your lap. Alternatively, you can test it by gently lifting them up in a soft hold and depositing them in your lap. Give them a chin tickle but keep your hands loose so they don't feel constrained or trapped. They will often jump straight off, but don't take this personally. It may take a few attempts before they're comfortable to sit on your lap for a prolonged period and to get a good cuddle. If this is happening, then your feral cat is now indeed domesticated. Once the kitten feels completely safe in your lap and in your hold, then you can also pick him/her up into an upturned baby position and give their belly a soft tickle.

7. Spontaneous Flop and Roll Over – When the kittens or cats greet you by flopping over on their side and exposing their throat and belly then they signalling their trust and regard for you. Always give them a compliment and a pat or tickle in response so they can continue feeling safe and loved.

How to Socialise a Feral Kitten - Part IV

The Feral Kitten Socialisation Process – The First Two Weeks

The time to start establishing physical (touch) contact is when your kittens have begun to relax in their new home. They know when their food is coming, they know every nook and cranny of their room intimately, and they start to become curious about you. One clue as to their being relaxed is that they are cleaning themselves comfortably in front of you. Another sign is their body language – they may keep you at a safe distance but they walk around, rather than slink close to the ground or make a mad dash to their closest hiding place. 

You need to be subtle rather than overt or aggressive when you want to make your way into a feral kitten's heart. You do so by engaging in play behaviour. You can walk around the room with a long piece of string trailing from your hand or pocket. The string should be tied to a small object that catches their eye as it moves. They will become transfixed by the movement to the point of either sitting and watching it or actually stalking and pouncing on the object. 

My favourite tool, as described in the previous post, is to use a ping pong ball. I just sit on the floor and roll it side to side until it catches their attention. Their ears will invariably perk up and their eyes will grow wide. Sometimes they forget themselves and walk up closer to you to investigate. That is the perfect time to engage with them by batting the ball towards them. Aim to roll it between their paws. They may jump back slightly but usually they will test the ball with their paws. If all is clear from their standard and perspective, they will start batting the ball themselves and chase it around the room.

Socialising a feral cat or kitten is an act of expansion. By that I mean that you start off small and then build step by step so their physical play territory expands, and by virtue of that, the physical boundaries between you and the cats diminishes. You can actually start a game where you bat it to the kitten and the kitten bats it back to you. You will need to be the leader in the game and keep returning it to the kitten so that you are both participants in the same game with each other. It is not uncommon for the kitten to become so engrossed with the ball game that he/she will indiscriminately run towards you and even sidle up to you in order to get the ball and ultimately forget that he/she had previously perceived you as a threat. If that's happening, then count it as a major step in what I call your "conquest by kindness" technique, although "conquest" may be too loaded a word. Let's just say strategic in that you are working with cat psychology.

The other thing you can do is to leave various size boxes around the room, or alternatively, canvas shopping bags or the old fashion shopping paper bag. Cats love exploring these objects, and will often climb inside and make themselves at home. This will perpetuate the notion in their world that this is an environment in which they can interact yet still feel safe.

The best way to make that first physical contact with a cat is while they are eating. Once you have established the daily routine and they begin to anticipate all the elements, begin to progressively sit closer to their feeding station every day at meal times. Once you reach the stage where you are sitting alongside them and they are comfortable with your presence and continue to eat without being hyper vigilant or running away, then slowly extend your hand towards the kitten or cat. You may need to do this in increments – at first the kitten may run or hide, or maybe it will shift position or maybe it will stay there. Depending on how the kitten reacts, never try to force a touch on them. The best time to do this is when they are still hungry and fully engaged in chowing down their food. When you reach a point where you can stroke them, just do one move. Touch them gently on the back of the neck and run your hand down its spine and through to the tip of the tail. If the kitten/cat doesn't resist or shirk, continue in the same way. After a while he/she will start purring, and begin associating you with comfort and pleasure. 

Cheap Cat Tunnels

Don't know whether Aldi has sold out, but I picked up one of these nifty cat tunnels, which I thought was good value for $10.00, from one of their local stores. My cats have found it quite fascinating, as it appeals to their intelligence, sense of curiousity and play. My tunnel – or should I say my various cats' tunnel – is black and white rather than blue and yellow like the pic. If you want to buy it just go to the Aldi website.

I just had a moment of great amusement about the tunnel. It's located in the room next to my office. My door was open and one of the feral farm cats called Boots (I need to get a photo of him to show you) who is black with white paws hence the name, just sauntered inside just to have a look at what he could find in here. I sat quietly for about ten minutes and let him be, and then peeked around the corner to see what he was doing. He was exploring the cat tunnel. Evan feral cats like to let their guard down and play every now and then!